One of Damned Days

There will be days when you get home from a party and forget what the fun was about, or have a very long, intimate conversation with someone yet you feel there are still words left unspoken, or embrace your special someone and never have the strength to say how much you care. Indeed, life tells us that happiness is never absolute.

One day you will meet the person almost perfect for you, promises exchanged and the devotion showed seemed tireless, and yet there will be a day when you find yourself standing in the pit of nothingness and the love of your life is gone, preferring the arms of someone else because yours became too familiar.

Then there will be days when you stop crying for the one that left you and mourn for the one that got away. Wondering what could have been had you waited long enough or had you found the courage to take your chances.

Then there are those days when you have finally decided you have cried enough and mourning is over, that you find yourself laughing again. You start meeting people and there will be one who will stand out from the rest. One who is not the one you hope to be intimate with because your expectations are not met, and yet, you flush when he smiles at you, you laugh at his lousy jokes, you giggle at his clumsiness when he tries to please you, and you miss him the minute he is not before your very eyes.

These are the kind of days when you cannot seem to care and just be happy in the moment. Quiet times just holding hands or hugging each other in the middle of nowhere, not minding the time nor caring for the age.

But like any ordinary days, it must come to an end. As the sun comes to set in the horizon so must you realize that nothing is absolute. It pains you to know that just when you have finally found your one chance to be happy in love again, you must let go for reasons greater than love itself.

Life tells us that happiness is never absolute, so while it is there, seize the moment and damn caution, because it may never come again.

(April 16, 2007, Tumindao, Sitangkai)